I have been soaking up my family. I love having my brother and his wife and my sister and her husband and little boy here. My dad actually drove up for an afternoon visit the other day, which is very rare. We spent the majority of the day together. and we get to hang out with more cousins and aunts and uncles tomorrow.
It is so fun seeing my mom so happy and giddy over the gifts she picked out for her grandchildren. It is so fun seeing all of our little kids interact and reminiscing about the good old days when we were little and causing trouble and gray hairs.
I've laughed until I've cried. And I've cried just because. Being so overwhelmed with the self-imposed pressure of the holidays and the unspoken fear and apprehension of future holidays to come, which is normal whenever my brother is up for deployment. I hate the nagging 'what if's' and the fact that I am even worrying when I should just be enjoying all we have right now.
So my prayer for tonight is this, that God would grant me the peace and presence of mind to enjoy my present. My gift of family.